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| <HTML> <HEAD> <TITLE> JavaScript DESTINATION - P121 </TITLE> </HEAD> <BODY> <SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript"> <!-- var O=0; var S=0; var G=0; var P=0; var I=0; var W=0; var L=0; var Insult=""; var resolution=""; function OldEnough() { if (!confirm("Stlacte tlacidlo OK v pripade, ze mate 18 alebo viac rokov")) history.go(-1); return "<HR>"; } document.writeln(OldEnough()); function process() { BuildInsult(); alert(Insult); } function BuildInsult() { currentdate=new Date (); seconds=currentdate.getSeconds(); if (S==1) Insult="You "+Political()+Intelligence()+Weight()+Looks()+Gender()+"!!!!"; else if (S==2) Insult="You "+Political()+Intelligence()+Weight()+Looks()+Ending()+Gender()+"!!!!"; else if(S==3) Insult="You "+RandomEnd()+Political()+Intelligence()+Weight()+Looks()+Ending()+Gender()+"!!!!"; else if (S==0) Insult="You "+Political()+Intelligence()+Weight()+Looks()+Gender()+"!!!!"; } function RandomMale() { if (seconds<6) return "dick "; else if (seconds<11) return "bastard"; else if (seconds<16) return "sperm-bank "; else if (seconds<21) return "dickwad "; else if (seconds<26) return "dickhead "; else if (seconds<31) return "penis "; else if (seconds<36) return "ape "; else if (seconds<41) return "weiner "; else if (seconds<46) return "pecker "; else if (seconds<51) return "prick "; else if (seconds<56) return "jerk-off "; else if (seconds<61) return "schmuck "; } function RandomFemale() { if (seconds<6) return "hag "; else if (seconds<11) return "wench "; else if (seconds<16) return "bitchwad "; else if (seconds<21) return "shrew "; else if (seconds<26) return "tramp "; else if (seconds<31) return "slut "; else if (seconds<36) return "bitch "; else if (seconds<41) return "bimbo "; else if (seconds<46) return "tart "; else if (seconds<51) return "scuz-bag "; else if (seconds<56) return "floozy "; else if (seconds<61) return "douche bag "; } function RandomNeutral() { if (seconds <6) return "pukebreath "; else if (seconds<11) return "frotterist "; else if (seconds<16) return "asswipe "; else if (seconds<21) return "rectum-head "; else if (seconds<26) return "asshole "; else if (seconds<31) return "assface "; else if (seconds<36) return "vomit-face "; else if (seconds<41) return "coprophagiac "; else if (seconds<46) return "fuckstick "; else if (seconds<51) return "twit "; else if (seconds<56) return "loser "; else if (seconds<61) return "pisshead "; } function RandomDemocrat() { if (seconds<15) return "Clinton-lovin' "; else if (seconds<25) return "Hillary-lovin' "; else if (seconds<37) return "card-carrying liberal "; else if (seconds<45) return "draft-dodgin' "; else if (seconds<53) return "pinko-commie-sympathizin' "; else if (seconds<60) return "no-inhalin' "; } function RandomRepublican() { if (seconds<7) return "Pat-Buchanan-lovin' "; else if (seconds<15) return "Dole-lovin' "; else if (seconds<24) return "fascist "; else if (seconds<38) return "war-mongering "; else if (seconds<50) return "corporate-lovin' "; else if (seconds<60) return "money-grubbing "; } function RandomIndependent() { if (seconds<12) return "Ross-Perot-lovin' "; else if (seconds<20) return "anarchistic "; else if (seconds<30) return "indecisive "; else if (seconds<44) return "politically ambiguous "; else if (seconds<57) return "vacillating "; else if (seconds<60) return "politically neutured "; } function RandomSmart() { if (seconds<7) return "book-wormish "; else if (seconds<13) return "four-eyed "; else if (seconds<19) return "armchair-philosphizing "; else if (seconds<25) return "Einstein-impersonating "; else if (seconds<31) return "cerebral "; else if (seconds<37) return "pseudo-genius "; else if (seconds<43) return "bombastic "; else if (seconds<49) return "arrogant "; else if (seconds<55) return "grandiose "; else if (seconds<61) return "psuedo-intellectual "; } function RandomStupid() { if (seconds<8) return "dumbshit "; else if (seconds<16) return "cerebrally-challenged "; else if (seconds<27) return "brain-dead "; else if (seconds<36) return "vacuous "; else if (seconds<45) return "witless "; else if (seconds<56) return "airheaded "; else if (seconds<60) return "moronic "; else if (seconds<60) return "pea-brained "; else if (seconds<60) return "nit-witted "; else if (seconds<60) return "chicken-brained "; else if (seconds<60) return "obtuse "; else if (seconds<60) return "idiotic "; else if (seconds<60) return "dense "; } function RandomFat() { if (seconds<5) return "fat-ass " else if (seconds<11) return "chubby "; else if (seconds<17) return "pork-bellied "; else if (seconds<23) return "portly "; else if (seconds<29) return "corpulent "; else if (seconds<35) return "obese "; else if (seconds<42) return "bovine "; else if (seconds<48) return "cow-like "; else if (seconds<53) return "fat "; else if (seconds<58) return "rotund "; else if (seconds<61) return "pudgy "; } function RandomSkinny() { if (seconds<12) return "pencil-necked "; else if (seconds<22) return "emaciated "; else if (seconds<30) return "anorexic "; else if (seconds<43) return "puny "; else if (seconds<52) return "bony "; else if (seconds<60) return "scrawny-assed "; } function RandomHot() { if (seconds<13) return "conceited "; else if (seconds<24) return "self-absorbed "; else if (seconds<35) return "vain "; else if (seconds<46) return "egotistical "; else if (seconds<51) return "full o'yourself "; else if (seconds<60) return "mirror-obsessed "; } function RandomDog() { if (seconds<8) return "butt-ugly "; else if (seconds<15) return "puke-inducing "; else if (seconds<23) return "barforific "; else if (seconds<31) return "ugolicious "; else if (seconds<41) return "vomitrocious "; else if (seconds<49) return "up-chuck-inspiring "; else if (seconds<55) return "zit-faced "; else if (seconds<60) return "pus-lipped "; } function RandomIntenseEnd() { if (seconds<15) return "smelly-crotched "; else if (seconds<23) return "hog-humping "; else if (seconds<29) return "rectum-sniffing "; else if (seconds<41) return "motherfucking "; else if (seconds<52) return "butt-licking "; else if (seconds<60) return "anus-licking "; } function RandomEnd() { if (seconds<15) return "turd-like "; else if (seconds<23) return "crud-infested "; else if (seconds<29) return "lame "; else if (seconds<41) return "vermin-ridden "; else if (seconds<52) return "pus-sucking "; else if (seconds<60) return "fart-sniffing "; } function General() { if (S==1) return ""; else if (S==2) return "damn "; else if(S==3) return RandomEnd(); else if (S==0) return ""; } function Gender() { if (G==1) return RandomMale(); else if (G==2) return RandomFemale(); else if (G==3) return RandomNeutral(); else if (G==0) return RandomNeutral(); } function Political() { if (P==1) return RandomDemocrat(); else if (P==2) return RandomRepublican(); else if (P==3) return RandomIndependent(); else if (P==0) return ""; } function Intelligence() { if (I==1) return RandomSmart(); else if (I==2) return ""; else if (I==3) return RandomStupid(); else if (I==0) return ""; } function Weight() { if (W==1) return RandomFat(); else if (W==2) return ""; else if (W==3) return RandomSkinny(); else if (W==0) return ""; } function Looks() { if (L==1) return RandomHot(); else if (L==2) return ""; else if (L==3) return RandomDog(); else if (L==0) return ""; } function Ending() { return RandomIntenseEnd(); } // --> </SCRIPT> <CENTER> <H4>Povedz mi nieco o sebe...</H4> <TABLE ALIGN=center BORDER> <TR> <TD><H5>Intenzita nadavky:</H5> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice2" VALUE="suck" onClick="S = 1">Jemna<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice2" VALUE="suck2" onClick="S = 2">Stredna<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice2" VALUE="suck3" onClick="S = 3">Vysoka<br></FORM> </TD> <TD><H5>Pohlavie:</H5> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="man" onClick="G = 1">Muz<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="woman" onClick="G = 2">Zena<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="Unspecified" onClick="G = 3">Nespecifikovane<br></FORM> </TD> <TD><H5>Politicka orientacia:</H5> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck" onClick="P = 1">Demokrat<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck2" onClick="P = 2">Republikan<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck3" onClick="P = 3">Nezavisly<br></FORM> </TD></TR> <TR><TD><H5>Intelekt:</H5> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck" onClick="I = 1">Nadpriemer<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck2" onClick="I = 2">Priemer<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck3" onClick="I = 3">Podpriemer<br></FORM> </TD> <TD><H5>Vaha:</H5> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck" onClick="W = 1">Nadvaha<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck2" onClick="W = 2">Normal<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck3" onClick="W = 3">Podvaha<br></FORM> </TD> <TD><H5>Vzhlad:</H5> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck" onClick="L = 1">Dobre-vyzerajuci<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck2" onClick="L = 2">Priemer<br> <INPUT TYPE="radio" NAME="Choice" VALUE="suck3" onClick="L = 3">Zle-vyzerajuci<br></FORM> </TD></TR></TABLE> <FORM><INPUT TYPE="button" VALUE="Vygeneruj nadavku" NAME="InsultButton" onClick="process()"></FORM> <HR></CENTER> </BODY> </HTML> |