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<title>JavaScript DESTINATION - P175</title>
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<h3>Contractor Needs Help on Shopping Cart</h3>
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"I only have a week left," says consultant Arnold Pahootiecheese. "I don't know what I'm going to do. I took the this job thinking it would just take a couple of days. You know, do it my spare time. It's just not that easy."
<p>
Pahootiecheese, a bus driver for the Moosejaw School district, was hired by the Province of Saskatchewan to create, "Western Provinces Shop!" an online shopping mall. It began as a cgi project to make a few extra bucks, but the driver has been overwhelmed by the demands of making an interactive shopping cart program for such a massive site. "It's like I've created a common gateway interface with the devil."
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<h3>Silent Majority: We Want Text To Blink</h3>
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As unlikely as it seems, a majority of users of the World Wide Web want blink tags. So says an extensive study recently released by academics and economists.
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The Webmonkey Institute's report, "The Silent Blink Movement" included data from a yearlong study of Web-active households made in conjunction with the University of Aardvark's Cognitive Sciences Department.
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Dr. Milki Porridge of UA says, "We were quite surprised by our findings. Not only do %89 of household members polled desire not some, but all of their text to blink, but also their favorite color is teal."
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<h3>Teen Fears Mailbombs; Needs One</h3>
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Some teens are so afraid of Internet terrorism that they feel that the only answer is to arm themselves with the very weapons they fear.
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A 15-year old usenet user who asked not to be identified said that he's so afraid of mailbombs that he'd "really like to learn how to do them." The youngster said the problems began soon after he contacted someone he referred to repeatedly as, "that kid with cancer who wants email."
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This 10th-grader's answer to his fears is to ask around for instructions for creating a mail bomb he can weild as a deterrent. "The flaming just doesn't seem to stop."
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<h3>Action Team Report - Part IV</h3>
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As part of our current series, Webmonkey Action Team reaporter Ivana Quilt checks in with her work at as a production editor at a well-known large database company - Ed.
<p>
I asked my new supervisor if we included doctype definitions as a policy. I tried not betray my surpise when he said that she had no idea what I'd been asking about. After gaining access to company documents on the subject the Action Team found out that not only did no one at OffGass, Inc. mention the secret "no doctype definition", but it seemed after months of undercover work that not a single employee had ever heard of SGML. At presstime, OffGass never hadn't returned our calls.
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